My night before Christmas.
2001.
The night before Christmas
and all through my house
children
are running and jumping
children Heck, even my spouse!
The stockings aren't hung
in fact, not even found....
they
are still in a moving box
somewhere, still bound.
I am not in my kerchief ~
not even my shoes
as I am
running around
hoping my mind, I won't lose.
I start to sit down
to my last wrapping chore
when
I hear hubby yell
"The dog's out the door!"
Hubby and I jump up
and head to the yard
the kids'
yelling and screaming
Boy, that dog's running hard!
Spouse running this way
Kids running that
Roxie, I
know,
like me wants a nap.
I desperately yell
(Minus the curses, of course!)
"Roxie,
you want a cookie?"
She returns ~ No remorse.
Finally back inside
things begin to calm down
so I
try to arrange
the porcelain Christmas Town.
Then what do I hear?
Good LORD what's that clatter??
Fearfully
I begin to wonder
NOW what is the matter?
Madison is screaming
Jory is running amuck
Neighbors
are pounding at the door
"Ma'am your boys' head is STUCK!!"
"Yes." I try to say sweetly
to the man in the yard.
"We
are working on it ~
but you see, it's quite hard.
The clever little one
looking for new things to do
locked
us out of his bedroom
and to his window HE FLEW.
We are on one side
pounding on the door
His head is
caught in the bars
and by now, I am sure, is sore."
The squealing, the screaming
the running around
Neighbors
jumping over the fence
the dogs barking on the ground.
Well, The neighbors, My husband
and the dogs worked it
out.
My son, when unstuck
came to his door, with a pout.
The neighbors were thanked ~
Then sent on their way
after
all I still needed
to finish my day.
The lasagna for dinner
is now sadly burned ~
The heat
set to "Broil"
too late, did I learn.
"One more day, I can make it!"
I say to myself
I shut
my eyes, grit my teeth
and wish for an Elf.
Slowly I open my eyes
Surprise!! There's no Elf.
I
shake my head sighing....
"I guess I'll do it, myself."
But when tomorrow comes
and the gifts are unwrapped...
The
screaming can start ~
Madison can get his head trapped.
"Why?" do you ask
the sudden change in my tone?
You
would never need wonder
if you visited my home.
With any luck going
at the close of the day
when you
look to the sky ~
and you see Santa's sleigh
There I will be relaxing
and you'll hear me say:
"To
Heck with Calgon,
Santa take me AWAY!!!"
By: C. Hahn December 24, 2001